真的假的

Welcome to America's Got Talent. Thanks. Who are you? My name's Ethan Jan. I'm from Redlands, California. How old are you? I'm 17 years old. 17 years old. So you're in school? Yeah, I'm a junior in high school. And what do you want to be when you grow up? I actually don't really have much of an idea. Well, what are you going to do for us? Just going to do a quick Rubik's Cube act. You make it sound so much more exciting than it actually is. Do you think you can win this contest? Hmm. Well, that's the spirit. Yeah. Okay. I cannot wait to see what you're going to do right here. Thanks. Go ahead, buddy. So judges, may I please come down to the front desk over there? Please. The front desk? We're not checking you out. Or desk. Do you want to talk to the concierge? All right. So in front of the four of you, there's a Rubik's Cube. Could all of you please scramble them up as much as you would like? Like whatever we want? Yes. Okay. You know what I used to do when I couldn't figure it out? I would take all the stickers off and re-stick them. All right. Now that these Rubik's Cubes are all scrambled up, I'm going to do something a little bit fun. What's the next level? Upstairs. He's a genius. Howie, that's what he is. When I met you, you were not very excited for what you were going to do. Oh, no. I was like so excited. I was just a little bit nervous at the same time. I wasn't sure how to act. Yeah. Now you're transforming in front of us. And that was amazing. That was flawless. It was super fun. It was showmanship as well. It doesn't in theory sound super exciting, but this was so incredible. I mean, again, I don't think that there's a human inside of you. Probably a robot. I don't know. Because your eyes were like. It was incredible. You've just done. Incredible. What you did was truly amazing. And I love how you underplayed it. And then you just dazzled us. So we are going to vote. I would like to start off with the first yes. We love being surprised. That was a big surprise the whole time. And that's why you've now got four yeses. How do you feel right now? I'm just really happy to have gotten four yeses. That was really unexpected. Well, you deserve it. You deserve it. You did such a great job, my man. Absolutely incredible.

大家好。 早安。 你冷嗎? 不。 我看見你做這個。 雖然是70度。 這是我第一次在這裡。 我很緊張。 你緊張的時候,你去法庭? 對,這是我第一次。 這是你第一次在法庭? 對。 到現在,你還好嗎? 到現在。 對。 我覺得今天是夜店日, 法官 Quinn。 Janelle has four overnight parking tickets all at the same location. So, what do you want to tell me about these, Janelle? I just want to know if I'm able to pay in October because I start my job on October 5th and my card isn't registered, so I wasn't able to get the permit sticker yet because my card gets registered in November. What do you do for work? Are you working? No, not yet. I'm going to be working at St. Tanner's on October 5th. And what did you do? What was your last job? Walmart. You worked at Walmart? Yeah. You're in sales. Are you a good salesperson? Yeah. You're going to work at a bank now, huh? At St. Tanner? Yes. Yeah. You're going to be what? You're going to be chief operating officer? What are you going to do? I'm customer service, taking... See, she's a good person. All of a sudden, we're going to have to smile, Inspector Quinn. Smile a little more and give me the keys to the vault. Let's work on that one. All right. These overnight parking tickets, is this because you did not have a parking spot? Is that an area where you live? Yeah, it's very full, so I have to park outside on the streets. Do you have a parking spot now? No, once I get my card registered, I'm going to get the ticket for it. The fines are $200 now because they all tripled. I'm going to fine you $20. I'm going to fine you for one of these tickets. And I'm going to give you all the time you need to pay it. I mean, who do you live with? You live with your parents, you live alone, you live with... It's just me and my daughter. We rent a place. Your daughter? You have a young daughter? How old is she? Ten months. Ten months? It's just you and she? Yeah. Oh. What's her name? Camila. We can't let you pay $20 because then, I don't know, maybe when you go home tonight, you need some food for the baby and if you pay $20 here, maybe you won't be able to afford the food, so I'm not going to do that. We have to take the baby into consideration in respect to Camila. And right now, she's like between a rock and a hard place. She wants to buy the parking passes. She can't because the registry isn't accommodating those right now. Right? And she's looking to do that. And she doesn't have a job, but she's got a little baby. So, when I can't take care of a ten-month-old child, I know I can't do that. There are a whole bunch of things you can do. You have nothing. Nothing. Your story really touches me. You only have one child. I guess you have a lot of challenges being a single mom. What is the biggest challenge? Taking care of the baby the whole night. You're dedicated to the baby. There are a lot of generous people in this country. We are on social media, and we are on television, and people throughout the world see what happens in this courtroom. And they send in contributions voluntarily and ask me to give them to people, I think, to use them toward people who I think are worthy, and you certainly are. So, I have a gentleman actually from Eustis, Florida, by the name of Gary Ashcraft. He sent in $25 and said, please use this to help a single mom who's doing everything she can to help her children. That's you. So, I'm going to use that $25 to pay for your ticket. But I'm going to do a little bit more than that. I mean, since you came in broke today, there are an awful lot of people who send in some money here. So, I don't want you leaving here today and not having enough money to take care of your baby. So, I am going to, with the generosity of people from throughout the country who have sent in cash, I am going to give you $50 in cash for you to use to take care of your baby. Thank you. And you put that to good use. Thank you so much. Anything you want to say to the person who sent in that money? I'll always say thank you so much, and I really do appreciate it.

Okay, I'm just going to stand here and take this all in 40 years not letting go of this. So just quickly, thank you Hollywood Foreign Press for giving me this honor. It's been an amazing journey and incredible fight to be here today. But I think it's been worth it. I remember when I first came to Hollywood. It was a dream come true until I got here because look at this face. I came here and was told you're a minority and I'm like, no, that's not possible. And then someone said to me, you speak English. I mean, forget about them not knowing Korea, Japan, Malaysia, Asia, India. And then I said, yeah, the flight here was about 13 hours long. So I learned. As time went by, as I just turned, I turned 60 last year. And I think all of you women understand this as the days, the years and the numbers get bigger, it seems like opportunities start to get smaller as well. And I probably was at a time where I thought, well, hey, come on, girl, you had a really, really good run. You worked with some of the best people, Steven Spielberg, Jim Cameron and Danny Boyle. And so it's good. It's all good. Then along came the best gift, everything, everywhere. All at once. Shut up, please. I can beat you up, okay? And that's serious. And I thank you, A24, Leyline, for believing in these two goofy, insanely smart, wonderful geniuses, the Daniels, who had the courage, who had the courage to write about a very ordinary immigrant, aging woman, mother, daughter, who was the worst thing trying to do her audit. She was being audited by the IRS, played by the most amazing Jamie Lee Curtis. I love you. I was given this gift of playing this woman who resonated so deeply with me and with so many people, because at the end of the day, in whatever universe she was at, she was just fighting, fighting for love, for her family. And without Evelyn Wong was no one without Kee Kwe Kwan, Raymond Wong, and there was no joy in her life without Stephanie Hsu, the most amazing Stephanie Hsu, and my hard dog lover, Jamie Lee Curtis. To Jonathan Wong, my producer, thank you for being there with us every step of the way. My managers, David Unger and Kit Wong, who believed in me. And this is also for all the shoulders that I stand on, all who came before me, who looks like me, and all who are going on this journey with me forward. So thank you for believing in us. Thank you. Thank you so much.

Oh, we like war. We like war. We're a war-like people. We like war because we're good at it. You know why we're good at it? Because we get a lot of practice. This country's only 200 years old and already we've had 10 major wars. We average a major war every 20 years in this country, so we're good at it. And it's a good thing we are. We're not very good at anything else anymore. Can't build a decent car. Can't make a TV set or a VCR. What the fuck? Got no steel industry left. Can't educate our young people. Can't get health care to our old people. But we can bomb the shit out of your country, all right? We can bomb the shit out of your country, all right? Especially if your country is full of brown people. Oh, we like that, don't we? That's our hobby. That's our new job in the world, bombing brown people. Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya. You've got some brown people in your country. Tell them to watch the fuck out. Or we'll goddamn bomb them. But when's the last white people you can remember that we bombed? Can you remember the last white? Can you remember any white people we've ever bombed? The Germans. Those are the only ones. And that's only because they were trying to cut in on our action. They wanted to dominate the world. Bullshit. That's our fucking job. Think of how we started. Think of that. This country was founded by a group of slave owners who told us all men are created equal. Oh yeah. All men. Except for Indians and niggers and women, right? Always like to use that authentic American language. This was a small group of unelected white male land-holding slave owners who also suggested their class be the only one allowed to vote. Now that is what's known as being stunningly and embarrassingly full of shit. I think Americans really show their ignorance when they say they want their politicians to be honest. What are these fucking cretins talking about? If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. No one would know what to do. Honesty would fuck this country up. And I think deep down Americans know that. That's why they elected and re-elected Bill Clinton. That's why. Because the American people like their bullshit right out front where they can get a good strong whiff of it. Clinton might be full of shit, but at least he lets you know it. Dole tried to hide it, didn't he? Dole kept saying, I'm a plain and honest man. Bullshit. People don't believe that. What did Clinton say? He said, hi folks, I'm completely full of shit, and how do you like that? And the people said, you know something, at least he's honest.

Hi guys, so just a quick update from me. For those of you who don't know me, my name's John, I'm a funeral director based in Milton Keynes. I run a funeral home called Milton Keynes Family Funeral Services, and this time it is the 6th of December 2021. So what we're seeing is a large number, an unnaturally large number of deaths due to heart attack, stroke, aneurysm, and these are all as a direct result of thrombosis, embolisms in the lungs, the legs, various places that's causing these deaths. These are well documented by the local coroners, these are well documented, you know, across the country. And now I've seen more this year than I have in the previous 14, to give you an idea. I've written to the Chief Coroner of England, he isn't concerned. I've had no response for weeks and weeks, and then I've had an email from his secretary saying he's not interested. So we're seeing those deaths. The other type of death that I'm seeing, which is more distressing for me personally, is people who are getting sick now as their immune systems finally give up. So they've had the jabs maybe six, eight months ago, and it's been eaten away at their immune system, and now they're struggling to fight off things like the common cold. So we're in winter, and as you'll be aware, there are colds and flus about at this time of the year. These people can't fight it off, and the government are very quick to label it Omnichron, a new variant. You know, and they are sick, but they're sick with basic things like the common cold. Their immune systems are decimated, and if you think about it logically, much like, for example, a cancer patient. So when you get a cancer patient and they're on chemotherapy, it decimates their immune system, and one of the things that they have to be extremely careful of is because they've got no immune system, a basic common cold or a flu can kill them. And this is what we're seeing now in these jab recipients across up and down the country. They're becoming extremely ill, really, really ill. For example, I've got a couple of friends, I've known them for a long time, very intelligent guy, logical thinker, him and his wife are both in jabs. He's had one, he's had both. He's bitterly desperate now, he's desperate to get the booster because he feels so terribly ill, he thinks that will make him feel better. You know, what do you say to these people because they just won't? I'll try to explain. This is what is killing you. This is killing you. It's damaging your immune system. All you've got is a common cold. And I said to him, look, I will come over, I'll bring you whatever you need. I will kiss you on the lips because I'm in no danger of falling sick because I have an immune system that's protecting me as a guy who hasn't been jabbed. These people, you know, it was well documented on the Georgia guide stones and other places what would happen. These people are going to willingly walk over the cliff begging for more. This is why, it's because these jabs are decimating your immune system. The other type are the blood clots that are quick killers and we've seen plenty of those as well. So please, please, please, don't take any more of these jabs. It's killing you. It's killing you. And lining up for more jabs when you're desperately ill already isn't the answer. It really isn't the answer. Take a step back. Just look a little bit deeper than the BBC and Google are telling you. The jabs are what are making you ill. The Omicron is vaccine injury. They're nothing more than that. Will you believe it? I really don't know. I really don't know. Time will tell, I guess. Time will tell. But that's where we are in December of 2021. We're exactly where the scientists told me we would be. Sadly. I just hope that people listen. I hope that people listen because if they don't, they're going to get sick and they're going to die. That's the reality. You will die if you keep taking these jabs. And you know, bless you, bless you. Forgive them for they know not what they do. Never a true word spoken.

And I love you so. The people ask me how, how I've lived till now. I tell them I don't know. I guess they understand how lonely life has been. But life began again the day you took my hand. And yes, I know how lonely life can be. The shadows follow me, and the night won't set me free. But I don't let... Now that you're alive and you love me too, your thoughts are just for me. You set my spirit free, I'm happy that you do. The book of life is brief, once the page is read. All but life is dead, that is my belief. And yes, I know how lonely life can be. The shadows follow me, and the night won't set me free. Evening get me down, now that you're around.

Oh, Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling, from glen to glen, out and side, the summer's gone and all the roses fall. It's you, it's you who must go, and I must find. But come ye back when summer's in the ghetto, or when the valley's hushed and white with snow, and I'll be here in sunshine or in shadow. Danny Boy, oh Danny Boy, I love you so.

你好，我們有收到一封訊息，想向你們求證是否為真，謝謝。內容如下: I am interested in your advertised property but first, I have something very confidential to discuss with you. I am a U.S soldier assigned to be protecting the Red Cross officials here in Aleppo. I have the sum of $9.2 million in two medium sized boxes that were handed over to me by a Syrian business man for safekeeping. Unfortunately, this man and his family were accidentally killed in a bombardment by Russian forces in Aleppo. He was a very successful business man dealing on gold dust/bars before his death. Because of my closeness to him, he brought the money in a box here for me to assist him store in the Red Cross storage warehouse and he had no knowledge that he and his family were going to die. The entire money is in cash and stacked in a box. For safety reasons, I cannot continue to keep this huge sum of money here. I want to transfer this fund to you as the beneficiary through the Red Cross diplomatic courier services because I don't know where to keep this fund again here in Syria. I just need your acceptance and I will start the courier process. For your sincere assistance, I will give you 20% of the money which is $1.84 million. I want to invest the fund in real estate or any other sector which you can recommend. I cannot transfer this fund through bank because here, banks are controlled by government forces which make it impossible too because of the sanction imposed on the country by United Nations. I can only send this money out of here as a registered diplomatic cargo and transported by a Red Cross jet which flies in and out of here two times a week. Where I am now we can only communicate through the Red Cross communication facility which only permits me to send Emails and we can't make phone calls now because in the area which I am presently, phone communication network was blocked by the government. Please if you are interested in helping me I will give to you the complete details you need for us to carry out this transaction successfully. I think it will be good to diversify our investment. Apart from real estate we can as well invest in other sectors. As for me I think it is good to first invest in real estate. I would owe you my life if you help me. I wait for your fast response so I can give you further details upon hearing from you. Regards, Kenny

Mr. Chu, does TikTok access the home Wi-Fi network? Only if the user turns on the Wi-Fi. I﹑m sorry, I may not understand the﹑ So if I have TikTok app on my phone and my phone is on my home Wi-Fi network, does TikTok access that network? It will have to access the network to get connections to the Internet, if that﹑s the question. Is it possible then that it could access other devices on that home Wi-Fi network? Congressman, we do not do anything that is beyond any industry norms. It has spiked and spied on American citizens. I don﹑t think that spying is the right way to describe it. The only face data that you will get that we collect is when you use the filters to have sunglasses on your face. We need to know where your eyes are. Why do you need to know what the eyes are if you﹑re not seeing if they﹑re dilated? American data stored on American soil by an American company overseen by American personnel. We call this initiative Project Texas. Please rename your project. Texas is not the appropriate name. We stand for freedom and transparency, and we don﹑t want your project. You damn well know that you cannot protect the data and security of this committee or the 150 million users of your app, because it is an extension of the CCP. From the data it collects to the content it controls, TikTok is a grave threat of foreign influence in American life. It hurts me to hear questions this dumb and self-serving. Watching these congressional leaders, people we elected to represent us, are you kidding? At least people can see how stupid the people who run our country are. At least people can see forever positions, these no-term limits, what a problem it is to have these people get elected over and over again, never having heard their thoughts before, never having seen how stupid. And misaligned they are, how out of touch with the American people they are, and all they care about is their own power. If you listen to these members of Congress speak, you would think that they were rulers, emperors. Congress is full of queens and kings and mob bosses. These are the people that run our country, the people who are in charge of our future. They are so incredibly stupid, like so dumb. I, I, a guy literally asked if TikTok connects to the WiFi. How did we get here? You'd think they'd accidentally land on a point. And I give credit to the CEO, honestly, he weathered the storm. He was the only one who knew what the fuck they were talking about. These old, out of touch motherfuckers, they were bond paid for by Mark Zuckerberg. And it's just so obvious that they've never once used the app. I'm embarrassed for our country, I really am. We must be the fucking laughingstock of the world right now.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. And a special thanks to the 42% of you who actually applauded. I'm really excited to be here tonight with the only group of Americans with a lower approver rating than I have. This is the first time the President attended this dinner in six years. It's understandable. We had a horrible plague followed by two years of COVID. My predecessor came to this dinner this year. Now that would really have been a real coup if that occurred.